El Dorado, Newsweek & Me

Someone name dropped me on the Newsweek blog about what is going on in El Dorado. Someone named "doniesgirl" said the following:

· Comment: Interesting that the name Merrill Jessop is mentioned. Does anyone out there realize that there is a Jessop Compound right here in Concho, AZ. they have been here now for about 10-15 years, and noone seems to care. They actually had one of their own, Moroni Jessop working in the local DES office at one time for several years. Wonder if all those wives were able to more easily get assistance then perhaps a non FLDS person? I've often wondered why someone is not looking into what is going on here, because it is a known fact around these parts that young girls are involved in the arranged marriages. And have noticed lately an influx of more FLDS moving into the area. Concho is a small, quiet town located in northeastern Arizona with a big secret. Approximately 5 miles outside of town sits what is known as the Jessop compound, fenced and topped with razor ribbon. Are they keeping people out, or keeping them in? That my friend should be the question of the day.


Here is my response:

Comment: This is the "Moroni Jessop" that was spoken of in the blog about a polygamous "Jessop Compound" in Concho, Arizona. I am so angry to see such blatant lies published about me. I worked for Arizona DES for 9 years, and I am sickened to think that it is suggested that I was sent by a polygamous group to "help" plural wives get on public assistance. First of all, the author of that accusation obviously believes in the propoganda & negative stereotypes perpetuated by the media & by hate groups. I can honestly say - and so can anyone who ever worked with me - that I helped PREVENT abuse of the system, rather than encourage it. The manager of the Saint Johns, AZ DES office can tell you that this office has ZERO cases of fraud or abuse of the system, because of my education of the other polygamists o be honest and not to lie to the government.And it is a "known fact" that there are young girls in arranged marriages" That is bullsh**t!!!! Our community does not and has never advocated, taught, nor practiced arranged marriages, nor do we believe in underage marriage. In fact, the thought of seeing MY daughers married young SICKENS ME!!!Next, we are not FLDS. We do not affiliate with FLDS. We have no ties with the FLDS. We have never had ties with the FLDS.In addition, we do NOT have a compound. There is a 40 acre ranchette that I bought with my mother and two of my brothers. And that is really all that lives out there.And we have a fence topped with razor ribbon??? What the hell is that all about? We live on range land. All properties in this area have barbed wire. Our property had barbed wire when we moved out there - most of the fencing in disrepair and falling down.Our fence is mainly to keep the cows out. Hopefully it will keep out cows like doniesgirl. You should do more research before you post garbage, my friend.I have alway lived my lifestyle openly and honestly. If someone wants to know the truh, all they have to do is ask me, not resort to Salem-style gossip.

Dawn Smells Poo

So one good thing about the blogger putting out information for me is that I followed a link to a blog that Dawn is publishing in the UK about her experiences in L.A. So I got to read the post about her visit to our ranch. This is one of the things she posted about us:

"Last week, I was 6,500 feet up a mountain, miles into the Arizonia desert with a Mormon man, his two wives, nine children, dog Cookie, and a distinct smell of poo radiating from the manually pumped toilet.

"The sofa I was offered for a bed, usually Cookie's spot, was not sat on by five of the children - due to the youngest having urinated on it the week before - and the family meal of instant mashed potato, minced meat and salt flavourings, had my insides begging me to quit journalism, and get a much less liver clogging career.

"But the good points far outweigh the bad. The insight into the human mind and the paths that I crossed with people whom one would never usually even read about made every second of the discomfort worth it.

"It is quite a contradiction to come away from experiences like that feeling lucky but as I made my way back to civilization I knew I had just experienced something incredible."

Okay, the Smell:

Every time the wind kicks up, it sends up this weird odor into our house. It is not sewer. We believe that it comes from the wild cats that live under our house, but we are not sure. It was very windy while the film crew was here, and we apologized PROFUSELY for the odor.

The Sofa:

It is true that Cookie sleeps on the couch. We repeatedly chase her off, but the minute we return to bed, she is back up on the couch. Sara did fall asleep & pee on the couch. We are embarrassed about that.

When the producers originally wanted to have Dawn sleep on the floor (They originally wanted her to sleep on the floor!!), the girls were absolutely mortified. They were both offering their beds so that Dawn would not have to sleep on the sofa.

As it turned out, Dawn did NOT have to put her pretty head down on our sofa for any longer than ten or so minutes. She went & slept at Holiday Inn.

The Food:

The producers bought the food that we cooked. We wanted to make something simple; we settled on shepherd's pie. Dawn ate two servings.

Dawn's Fashion Sense:

We loved Dawn. She is totally a cool person, and we love her to death.

But the second half of her blog talks about her buying clothes for her shoot, and how she hopes that she will bring "colour" to our lives.

She says:

"I feel it is really important for me to go into these scenarios entirely as me, and not a compromised version of myself, with the hope of blending in. These worlds are so far removed from mine that I am as fascinated by their response to me and who I am, as to what I will discover about them.

"Maybe they don't care for clothes, and will think that I am materialistic and vain for dressing the way that I do. But this is all part of the fun.

"They get nothing but the real me, and even if they don't like it, it means we get to see the real them. Which no matter what I am wearing, will always be the most colourful thing on the screen."

LOL! What are we? Amish? There is some assumption that because of our lifestyle choice that we are not aware of the outside world. Temple pointed out that SHE was dressed more "colourfuly" than Dawn. See for yourself. That shirt is pretty loud! :)

Setting the Record Straight

Okay, the guy who posted the article changed it to reflect a more truthful representation of what went on. Maybe I was a little "hasty" in calling him an "asshole". Sorry about that. I have no clue at his intentions.

But you have to understand where I am coming from - everyone in this region gossips about us, and almost none of them (maybe 2 or 3) have actually come to the proverbial horse's mouth.

I can't tell you how much I appreciate it when people ask me directly how I live or how I believe. You can ask me anything you want. A sincere desire to know will be rewarded with an honest answer:

essene70@yahoo.com

But to set the record straight:

The "Temple"

My brother-in-law gave me permission to post a photo of his house. It is not even on my property, but two lots over. He is a young, single man who decided to build his dream house. He ran into some zoning problems & put the project on hold for a year to get the plans & permits squared away. It is NOT a temple, as you see.

Geeze, I would love to have the money to have my own temple. But sadly, I am one of the "poor" Mormons.

The "Compound"

What people are calling a "compound" is really only a 40 acre ranchette that I bought with my mother, my late father and two of my brothers. There is nothing else to it, and there is no one else that lives out there.

"FLDS"

We are not FLDS. We have no affiliation with the FLDS. We don't believe in child marriages; we don't believe in arranged marriages. Warren Jeffs to me is no prophet, but a freak. We don't wear pioneer dresses. We don't believe in women as slaves or property. We are not extreme conservatives. (I am a Democrat, for crying out loud.)

The Web - the Garbage Bin of Info of our Age

Some asshole posted on a website a detailed account of our community. They included:

1. That there is a "huge polygamist community" in the Show Low area.
Truth: Only about 4 or 5 families.
2. That there is a 3 story temple on our land.
Truth: That is my brother-in-law's home that he started building and did not finish. It is NOT a temple.
3. A link to the story about my bitch of a former sister-in-law's sob story of lies & deceit
4. A link to BBC reporter Dawn Porter's story with the polygamists.
Truth: C4, not the BBC
5. A You Tube video of our property.
6. Directions to my house.

Seriously. I am a little creeped out. Maybe I need to start lo9cking my door.

And to the asshole that published it - how would you like if I published online directions to YOUR house.

Get a life, you f***ing loser!!!!!!

The Aftermath

I spent a couple of nights sleepless thinking about some of the things I said. It is hard to have a camera on you round the clock and then sometimes you wonder of some of the things you said will make you look like a dumb ass.

For instance, Temple darted around the sex questions. Martha was mortified by them, and I am a little too open about questions like that. I didn't discuss explicit details. But when it comes to discussing the philosophy of sex, I am too open. An example - I talked about how Mormons are one of the few Christian religions that does not subscribe to the concept of Original Sin - that sex is dirty. Mormons share a common factor with some pagan religions in that we view sex as something holy and almost sacramental. But that there is this contradictory sentiment with sex that we also hold, because the orginal convert base of the early Mormon church was the Puritans of New England.

One of my friends commended me for being so open, but "you won't have anymore friends in the Mormon fundamentalist world because of your discussions on sex."

The day we finished shooting, Texas raided the FLDS compound and hauled off busloads of women and children. This augmented the feelings of paranoia in our community. It made us feel the poignant possibility that Arizona could do something similar.

And to many in my community, it increased the fear that my talking to the media would bring bad repurcussions on us. They view it like I have consorted with the enemy. Many are already second guessing my motivations. I am sure that they are saying that I have done this for money (what money?) or attention. They have no idea what motivates me, because they are too afraid to ask me.

But in my mind, how often does someone want to do a possitive approach about polygamy? And if not a possitive approach, how about an honest one?

Some of my other non-Mormon friends have congradulated me for being so brave and open in a world that has been so hostile towards us.

I look forward to the release of the two episodes. But at the same time, I am afraid, wondering if I have done the right thins.

The Last Day of Shooting

Okay, so it was different having Dawn, Charlie & Hank gone. But we had the good fortune to have Pascal, Joel & Sandy come back.

They rented a Jeep and pulled up at about 6:30AM. We did a repeat of yesterday. They filmed me getting everyone up and getting them ready for school. Then I took the kids to school. Joel tried to go in to film Sophie in her bedroom, but she slammed the door on the camera as they tried to get it. Joel came up to me and complained that he hardly had any footage of Sophie.

Of course, Sophie is still angry about participating. But I reminded her that we had an agreement that she needed to participate when they wanted us to all be together. We got some footage of the whole family on the porch.

When I got back from taking the kids to school, they were interviewing Martha & Temple in the kitchen. Temple later complained that every time they asked her questions, Martha would answer for her. You can see Temple's frustration in the photo. They later interviewed Martha privately, but they never got around to interviewing Temple. They only filmed her doing flashcards with the younger kids. She interpreted this to mean that they considered her the "insignificant wife", but I am pretty sure it was just time constraints.

They wanted to film me looking at my father's grave. They asked me some questions about my family history, and then he tried to pry into questions about the recent division in our community. He said, "The building behind you is your chapel, but you are not allowed to go in there. Do you want to talk about it?"

I told him that I didn't, but he kept prying, saying that it made for a compelling story about the difficulties that I had to go through being a polygamist. I tried to talk about it without talking about it. The thing they don't realize - one year later, I have just barely come to the point where I can talk to my mother and other family members without things getting awkward. Later, I agonized that I had talked about it as much as I had. But I don't think that they will show it. I didn't give them enough to make it a strong story point.

We decided to move the interview up to the hill behind my house. It is actually about 25 yards past my property line on the property of my neighbors - also polygamists. We had done our interview up there, because there was a pocket up on the hill where the wind was not blowing so hard. The wind had caused tons of problems for the microphones. Up on the hill, there was a spot where we could sit on the rocks, there was a great view of the valley, and we could interview without the wind causing us problems. Yesterday, Dawn had interviewed me up there, and my neighbors had driven by several times & said nothing.

Five minutes into the interview, a truck pulled up & my neighbor - usually a soft-spoken guy - started yelling at us to get off their property. I went down to reason with him, and he got in my face, yelling. At this point, I lost my cool and said a few choice words myself. He claimed that the camera crew had filmed his mother when she was down hauling water by my mother's house. I told him that I would speak to the director.

Pascal denied that they had filmed anything or anyone down at my mother's house. Even if they had, they could not air her image without her consent. However, this whole thing upset me.

We finished the interview up on top of the hill on my father-in-law's property.

We had lunch, wrapped up the interviews. The last thing that Pascal wanted to film was me doing something around the house. He asked me what my chores usually are. Don't get me wrong - I do alot of things around the house. But I am not Mr. Fix-it. They filmed me hauling away our broken generator to our junk pile. And I sliced my finger open doing it. Some Mr. Fix-it.

After they finished that scene, they said, "It's a wrap." So I guess it's not just a cliche.

The guys had to get to Phoenix to catch a plane. So we said goodbye to them. We will really miss the crew. It was a good experience.

I ran into town to deposit my check, and I ran into my brother. He told me that alot of people were upset with me for doing this. I just feel like I have angered everyone. But it is hard to describe - it is something that we felt to do.

The Second Day

The crew told me that they would be there at 6AM. I woke up at 5:30 AM and beat them to the punch. I got up and straightened up the house a bit. They arrived, did some shots of the spectacular sunrise, and Dawn crawled into her sleeping bag as if she had spent the night. They filmed me waking up the whole family. Dawn helped the kids get dressed & ready for school while Martha made some chorizo for breakfast.

When it was time for Dawn to get out of her pajamas, she asked where she could change. The bathroom was full, so she asked me to step out of Martha’s room so that she could change in private – with the camera guys in the room with her. Don’t ask me what that was all about.

I left for a while to take the kids to school. When I got back, they were doing a one-on-one interview with Temple. They went for a walk to the eastern edge of property. Temple told me later that the questions were a bit edgier – a lot sex-related questions. Temple was pretty smooth about answering those. Dawn told her, “Oh, you are clever.”

After that, Pascal (the director) came up with an idea to have Dawn go shopping with Martha. He asked where we usually go shopping, and I said that we usually shop at Wal-Mart in Show Low. We decided on Wilbur’s IGA in St. Johns for a couple of reasons. First, it is a quaint grocery store in a small town. Second, the people in St. Johns know who we are and are usually a little circumspect about us. I relished the thought that people would see Dawn with Martha and think that she was a prospective wife. So they loaded up the car with the cameras, and the two girls headed off for town with the crew’s van in tow.

I took advantage of the break to take a much-needed nap. They were gone a long time, and Temple started to get worried that we would not be able to go pick up the kids from school. So I called Hank, but they were already pulling up to the house. Dawn told me with a big grin how much she enjoyed her time with Martha. When they got to the grocery store, Hank had spoken with the manager, but they were not allowed in. Dawn said that the grocery store felt very oppressive, and that she felt like everyone was watching her.

They next wanted to do a one-on-one with me. They picked a spot on the hill right behind my house. It was a little rocky area sheltered from the wind (which was ever-present and causing problems for the microphones.) Our neighbors (also polygamists) kept driving by and checking us out.

Dawn asked me some very pointed questions – many of them about sex. They really didn’t bother me. They were mainly about how I can get away with having sex with my wives in a house hold of kids. That’s easy; you just have to be an opportunist. Next came the questions about whether I think I am really fair, if I really treat them well and whether or not I think I could really handle having another wife. Those questions are a little tougher. Because the truth is – no matter how fair I try to be, I am not always going to be fair. But I can say that I answered her questions honestly.

When I got back, I found Martha upset about her questions. She felt that they had focused way too much on sex. What is funny – my questions were basically the same as Martha’s, but Martha was very uncomfortable about the questions. We called Hank, Charlie and Pascal into the room, and they calmed Martha’s fears.

We wrapped things up, and I gave Books of Mormon to all the crew. Earlier, I had spoken about how I have begun to approach my religion from a Torah-based standpoint. Joel, the cameraman said, “I will read your book, because you have read mine (the Old Testament).”

I also burned a few CDs, because Hank was going on about how much he liked my ringback tone (“A Little Piece of Heaven” by Avenged Sevenfold).

Sandy also entertained the girls with his catalogue of celebrities that he has met.

Charlie had to get going for another shoot this week, and Hank had to get all the equipment loaded. So they had the family stand outside in the cold wind while we repeatedly did shots of us waving goodbye to Dawn. After the filming was done, we said goodbye for real. Dawn told me a little bit about the project. She went last week to San Diego to film a polyamorous family.

“I spent one entire night being rubbed,” she said. Whatever that means. This is my daughter Sophie & Dawn.

Anyway, they are going to Japan to do a shoot later this month. They are excited about that.
We said goodbye to Dawn, Charlie and Hank. It is really sad to say goodbye to these people. Pascal, Joe and Sandy will be back tomorrow to do the shoot for History Channel. The whole family is really excited about Sandy coming back.

The whole family was able to eat a dinner undisturbed, and we all went to be exhausted.

The First Day

In the morning, I went to take the kids to school. I got a call from Hank. He wanted me to meet at our house along with another producer named Charlie. This is a photo of Charlie. They showed up and ran through the schedule with us. Charlie was really good with the kids. He pointed out that his child was virtually the same age as Aidan.

Hank told me that I would be meeting Dawn out at the juntion of Highways 60 & 61, which is locally known as "The Y".

So I showered and sat around at home for what seemed like a long time, looking at my clock. Making sure the house was clean.

Hank also told us that I would be picking up Dawn alone. This seemed to really bug Temple. Why would I get to meet her first? Why could they not meet her as well? She was disturbed that they kept changing things. I told her at first that it was probably so that Dawn could check out the goods (me). But really I think it was because they would need room in the car for the camera.

Finally at 10:30 AM, Hank told me to meet him at the highway at 11 AM. So I drove the four miles of dirt road to the start of the highway to find - no one. I parked there and waited for almost a half-hour. I called Hank. No answer. Finally a blue Mini-Cooper pulled up, and Hank pulled up. With him was this giant of a man with a shaved head. His name was Sandy, and he had all this sound equipment strapped to his shoulder.

Hank needed to go get gasoline desperately, so I directed him to the neareat gas station in Concho. He left me with Sandy, who turned out to be the nicest guy. Sandy always carries his equipment with him, and I almost never see him.

The first thing Sandy said to me was, "You are not what I expected."

"What were you expecting?" I asked.

"I don't know," he said. "Harry Dean Stanton? Something more austere."

Hank showed up, and he asked me to follow him out the highway to meet Dawn. He gave me all sorts of complicated directions about what I needed to do.

This was the first lesson I received about Reality TV. It is not reality. Hank wanted me to drive past where they were waiting, turn around, wait for his signal, drive up, get out of the car, greet Dawn, invite her into the car and drive off. Wait, wait. You drove up too soon. Go back and do it again. Good, shake Dawn's hand. Put her picnic basket in the trunk. Dawn, get in the car. No start over. Dawn, you are not supposed to get into the front seat, because the camera will go there. Do it again, now drive up the hill.

My first impression of Dawn: she is hot! But she was wearing this red flannel shirt, cowboy hat and bright red cowboy boots. She looked like something out of Hee Haw. She told me later that she bought the boots the day before. She figured that since she was going to Arizona, she might as well try to fit in.

She hopped in the backseat. We had a camera riding shotgun, and a camera next to her in the backseat. She started asking me questions while we rode home. They were pretty good questions. Mainly about how the lifestyle works for us. I found Dawn to be personable and very likeable. We got home, and the interview was not over, so I made a couple of loops around the property.

I introduced Dawn to the family, and then I had to leave immediately to pick up the other kids from school. When I got back, Martha, Temple and Dawn were immersed in an interview in the living room. The producers asked us to keep the kids outside to prevent any noise from distrubing the interview. Aidan described it as the worst day of his life, because he could not even go inside after school. Charlie & Hank were great at keeping the kids occupied.

The girls & I noticed that Hank was kind of bummed out all day. It seemed like the crew kind of bossed him around and sent him to grab batteries. We were all looking forward to spending more time with him. This is Hank. You can see why my girls like him so much.

Dawn then helped Temple make some shepherd's pie for dinner, and we sat down to the typical chaotic meal.

Dawn also did a one-on-one with Sophie, which was a surprise, because Sophie was so deadset against being on camera.

In the evening, we lit a bonfire, and Dawn asked Martha, Temple and I questions about our relationship with each other, and a little about our religious beliefs. She seemed impressed that we are spiritual, and yet not fanatic about our beliefs.

Then Dawn helped the kids get ready for bed, and she got into pajamas herself. They threw out a sleeping bag for her, she climbed in and did a recap of her day for the camera. I listened as how she described how shocked she was when she saw our trailer, and yet was amazed to find how quaint and how much space there was when she actually went inside.

While I listened, one of the producers came up to me and hissed to me that I really shouldn't listen to her recap, because Dawn would be doing a one-on-one with me tomorrow. So they turned off the lights and gave Dawn a handheld camera that she whispered to for a while - who knows about what.

Then Dawn hopped out of the sleeping bag and left for the hotel.

Before they left, I thanked Charlie & Dawn for their honest portrayal of polygamy. So many journalists only want to spew vitriol. It's good to have an honest approach.

Then the whole family & I went to sleep to prepare for the next day.

The Evening Before

Well, we spent a good part of the day cleaning the house. We vacuumed. Do you know how hard this is in a house with no electricity? One tube of JB Weld, and the generator is back up and running again. We are so TV deprived.
We got a phone call from Hank. They were supposed to be here at 6PM; it is not 5:30. They are still in Phoenix. Apparently, the director dropped & broke his phone. They are sitting in an AT&T shop. Once they are finished, they will make the 4 hour drive up here. They will probably not be meeting us this morning, but they will call me first thing in the morning.
I wonder if I should tell them that AT&T does not even get service up here? His pretty little I-Phone will just be a useless I-Toy up here.
Oh, they also want to do an additional shoot on Thursday for History Channel.
So in the evening, the girls and I started wondering how we were going to feed everyone. So we made a grocery list and started into town. On the way, we got this call from Hank, and they were going to buy all of the food. So that was a relief to us. We all went to bed, anticipating the day before.