Nancy Grace Belches Her Opinion On Polygamy

On the flip side, check out this article:

So legal expert Nancy Grace thinks that Kody Brown, and his wives, from TLC's "Sister Wives" should all go to jail in her article entitled "Nancy Grace on 'Sister Wives Investigation: 'Kody Should Go To Jail!'"...


"The law is the law — bigamy is a 3rd degree felony in Utah. Those participating in the crime face a maximum of five years in prison and a $5,000 fine. But most likely, Utah will turn a blind eye, as usual."

and...


"When you don’t know a horse, look at his track record. Even with the family taunting authorities on national TV, it’s unlikely Utah will prosecute although clearly, they should!"

There's a nazi in every bunch...

Dr. Kat Talks About Polygamy

Check out this article here.

Dr. Kat is a well-known and respected sex and marriage therapist whom I have known for about 21 years. In this article, she discusses the Brown Family and their show "Sister Wives" on TLC.

Read the whole article! She does talk about me a little bit:

"I grew up in an area with alot of Mormons. I knew of one family who got excommunicated from the church because they followed the early Mormon tenants of plural marriage. I was very good friends with one of the sons. In the midst of discussing bands and art and generally hanging out like most teens and young adults do, we discussed with how one day the plight of Mormon polygamists would not only make an interesting television show but how it might help those of us busy just trying to keep one relationship working, understand and become more accepting of the concept. After all, these are just people trying to follow their belief system, provide for their families and love their partners."

I just have to comment a bit on Dr. Kat. I met her in high school when she was the quintessential, blond cheerleader-type. After getting her phone number and talking on the phone a few times, I quickly came to realize that she was (and is) one of the smartest people I know. Her open-mindedness was refreshing. She was one of the few people that I could talk to about absolutely anything. She shared my tastes in music. We liked the same kind of movies. (I have a specific memory of going to see David Lynch's "Wild At Heart" with her.)

Dr. Kat was open-minded enough that she was one of the first people that listened to me as I confessed my belief in plural marriage. She didn't shoot me down or act shocked. She accepted me for who I am. In fact, she was one of the first people I called when I announced that I was getting married to my first wife, Martha, and she joked, "Oooh, maybe I could be your second wife!"

It has been great to see her career grow as a sex therapist, and I have followed her advice columns and websites for years. I am really luck to have such diverse friends, and I feel very blessed to have a friend like Dr. Kat.

She also mentions in her article:

"I mean what we are protecting here? Whether it is to deny individuals the right to a civil marriage based on sexual orientation or because we think there is something lascivious about multiple wives, or the subjugation of women through this model (we can debate that at another time), the powers that be seem to spend alot of time trying to force the rest of us to do what they think is right. I can think of a few times in history when that didn’t turn out so well.

"I’d like to think that we as a culture are evolving and that we can expand our definition of marriage to include all that are consensual, loving and healthy for those who are engaged in them. Frankly, evolution is not as linear a process as we once thought. Sometimes we end up chasing our own tails or take two steps back to gain one forward. It is a painful process for all of us.

Ultimately, what is good for you may not be good for me and that’s OK. Mutual respect for one another makes more sense than trying to dictate who and how we love. That being said, maybe plural marriage and gay marriage movement should join forces?"

I have always said that gay marriage and plural marriage are strange bedfellows. (Platonic bedfellows, okay? LOL) But it appears that we are in the same boat. And if there were other metaphors, I would use them as well. The older I get - I realize that I don't want anyone telling me what I can or ought to do in my own home, in my own bedroom and with whom. Why would anyone else NOT want the same right? Society, government, church - NO ONE - has the right to tell us how to live our lives - gay, straight, polygamist, monogamist, etc.

And that is my opinion. I will fight for my rights, and I will fight for yours. Have a good day. :)

Fair Circuit 2010 - Montana

The first place we set up was in Bozeman. The event went without incident, except that we were able to see some old friends (Jess & Brett).

In Colorado, I had bought some cheap $12 shoes, and once we got to Montana, the shoes had caused me a big, nasty blister on the bottom of my right foot. To make matters worse, my legs started to swell again. It was kind of a tough time. I was thinking that I must have a blood clot again. So one night, after we closed down the booth, I went to the hospital, and they checked me out - no blood clot! Just swelling caused by the vericose veins. It was a relief.

From Bozeman, we packed up and went to the Montana State Fair in Great Falls. There were some friends that I hoped to see there from last year. But no such luck. But we did meet some new friends.

One guy named Jason (a dead-ringer for Matt Damon) came out of his tent one morning to find me dressing my foot. The blister had popped, leaving an open sore on my foot. My feet were still swollen, and my toes were turning purple.

"I've been in the Marine Corps and been on a lot of hikes," Jason said. "But that is the worst foot sore I have ever seen. You need to get that checked out."

In truth, his words were an answer to prayers. I had just hobbled over to the common showers on the fair grounds and looked at my foot while I showered. While I limped back to our campsite, I knew something was not right and prayed inn my mind to God to know what to do. It was only a few minutes later that Jason had said what he did.

It was harder to admit that I needed help. I have this machismo thing where I have to be productive. I can't be holding people up due to my personal ailments.

So I waited until we got to Missoula before I went to the ER. The ER doctor stopped listening to me the minute he found out that I was diabetic. Basically, all that was happening to me was my own fault, he told me, because I wasn't taking care of myself and I pretty much deserved what I got. But he did prescribe me antibiotics that helped with the infection.

The whole rest of the trip, I suffered from swollen legs, but I started learning to deal with it. In spite of the health issues, I enjoyed my time in Montana.

We did tons of orders for medical marijuana farmers. Last year, we had seen several signs for medical marijuana clinics. This year, the stoner culture in Montana had visibly grown. We did custom t-shirts or hats for several marijuana farmers. We even got several offers to trade for marijuana, which actually seemed tempting until the next event occurred.

I got a phone call from the lady that manages my storage unit back in Arizona. She said that deputies had shown up with a warrant, had cut the lock to my unit, and had found marijuana in my unit. I was frantic. I had no idea how that could have possibly happened. I tried calling Apache County Sheriff, but they weren't answering. It felt like I was being framed for something. I strained my mind to try to figure out what could have happened.

I finally deduced - last year I had stored some things belonging to the daughter of a friend in my storage unit. It must have belonged to her. When the sheriff called me, that's exactly what happened. They had already figured it out themselves.

I took it as a sign from God. If I had been tempted to accept marijuana - and I was - there was a good reason not to take it home. I don't want to ever do anything to risk losing my kids.

Medical marijuana farmers gave us some of the best business. The next best customers we had were roller derby girls. This sport has become quite popular, and we sold many shirts and hats to this crowd - to the Hellgate Girls in Missoula, and to the Flathead Roller Derby Team. I tel you - these girls are bad ass! But they are all very cool, and I wish I could have knocked back a few beers with them.

From Missoula, we went to Kalispell. Then after six weeks, we headed home. It is always good to go home, but it was also good to see friends. (Special shout out to Wayne, Playboy T, Loki, the whole crew at Roll the Cage from Montana Department of Transportation. You guys make these trips worth it!)

Sister Wives on TLC

Yesterday, I was actually able to watch the new show "Sister Wives" on TLC, which was a rare treat as I don't have TV at home. I liked it! It did stir up some feelings and memories though, of what it's like to have cameras shoved in your face round the clock.

As a side note, in the past several months, there have been reruns of the show that we did with Dawn Porter on TLC as well as reruns of the show we did on History Channel. But I think it's funny the times that they choose to air them - both of them on Super Bowl Sunday and both of them again during the NBA Playoffs. LOL! The times when everyone will be watching something else. Our ratings were that bad that TLC dusts off our program whenever they have no audience.

But that's neither here nor there...

I remember that they originally pitched the Dawn Porter show at us to be a reality series. Can you imagine? The drab polygamists in the desert with the bright flower Dawn Porter in the middle.... for a whole season?? *shudder* Other production companies pitched series to us - Pink Sneakers, BBC in the UK...

I just can't imagine the stress of having the cameras on us 24/7.

And truth be told, after having watched "Sister Wives" on TLC, I really think that the family on the show - the Kody Brown family - is a much better family for this kind of show. They are very photogenic - Kody looks like he belongs on the Olympic snow team. They are well-adjusted and very smiley.

But most of all, they have a nice house. It's hard to put a good image on something when you are living in a trailer in the desert.

I have never met Kody Brown, even though we used to belong polygamous congregation back in the '90s. My brother-in-law says that I did meet Kody two years ago at the Utah State Fair, but I really don't remember.

But still, it's weird the connections that we have, even though we haven't met.

His wife Meri is a sister to one of my sisters-in-law. But I've never met her. I knew Christine back when we were young and single. I used to have a crush on her sister. But I haven't seen her in over fifteen years. The prospective wife Robyn is a distant cousin of my wife Martha. But I've never met her. When I was sick last year and missed working the Utah State Fair, one of my replacements was Moriah, Meri's daughter.

After watching last night's episode, I think that they are a great family, and I admire them alot. Especially Kody. It was like I looked at him as he addressed certain issues, and I knew what he was thinking. Because I have been there. Like the issue with one wife having fertility issues and being jealous of the other wife having children. I have been there. And I think Kody is handling everything beautifully.

So now, I hear that Utah is investigating the Kody Brown family for potential prosecution. And it breaks my heart. In response to that, I hear other fundamentalist Mormons say, "Well, it serves them right. What did they think would happen going in front of the media? They brought it on themselves!"

And that attitude breaks my heart even more. Somebody has to put themselves out there if we are ever going to make a difference, ever going to be heard. Somebody has to take the risk.

Kody Brown is making a difference for all of us. He is risking himself for all polygamists out there. I don't know if you'll read this, Kody. I'm sure that you are not like me and have better things to do with your time than scan the Internet for things said about you. But I want to say, thank you, Kody, for putting it on the line for me and my family.

Fair Circuit 2010 - Colorado

In the middle of July, I quit my job with the Census Bureau (it was going to end in a week anyway), kissed my family goodbye, and was soon driving as a passenger in a truck hauling airbrush equipment. As the red rocks of Gallup, New Mexico slid past us, I had a sense of excitement. Going on the road on the fair circuit is always an adventure.

I don't really want to talk much about what I do for my brother-in-law, or about his business, because, well, it's his business, and I want to give him as much privacy as possible. But the funnest part of this job is seeing different parts of the country, but most especially meeting new people. I love meeting new people. It makes it all worth it.

No sooner did we get onto the Navajo Nation that we got pulled over by reservation cops - heavily armed, decked out in ski masks, Kevlar and heavily armed. They took my brother-in-law out behind the trailer and interrogated him, leaving me to sit in the truck by myself.

Eventually one of the masked officers joined me and made conversation with me. He looked really intimidating. But he was friendly. He explained that he was masked, because he was an undercover officer and didn't want anyone to recognize him. He said that the Reservation had become a major corridor for drugs coming up from Mexico, and that our vehicle hauling a trailer was just the sort of vehicle used to transport drugs. Our stories must have jived, because they let us go.

Soon we were on our way, crawling up the Rocky Mountains. We drove past Telluride and its beautiful rocky peaks. By nighttime, we came down into the Gunnison Valley, where our fair was going to be. We had decided to do things on the cheap this year, so we went commando and pitched a tent in the parking lot, slept a while, and tore it down before anyone could notice.

While in Colorado, I noticed that my sock was bloody every night. I couldn't figure out why. I noticed that I had a small hole in the bottom of my sock. It freaked me out - a diabetic ulcer. I had heard about them. Now I finally had one. I dressed it, cleaned it and bandaged it. But to no avail - it kept getting worse.

One evening, as I looked at the ragged hole in my foot, I decided on a whim to reach into my shoe. There was a staple sticking through my shoe. I had been steppingon a staple all this time and didn't feel it. It was a relief to know that the staple had caused the hole in my foot, not diabetes. It was alarming that I had been stepping on this staple and hadn't felt it.

I tossed the shoes and bought a pair of Wal-Mart specials.

The one person I should mention meeting in Colorado was Jersey. How can I mention our adventure in Colorado without mentioning Jersey? He was called Jersey, well, because he is a New Jersey native who went on a snowboarding trip to Colorado at age 19 and just never went back. He was totally laid back, and yet totally hooked on conspiracy theories.

When I met him, he was asking local political candidates what they were going to do about the chemtrail problem. He got us to look up at the sky, and I had to admit - there were some pretty strange contrail patterns in the sky. He insisted that it was some sort of government conspiracy to poison our air and kill us all.

Jersey was the coolest guy we met. He was very interesting. At the end of the fair, he offered to put us up at his cabin, which was up in the mountains above Crested Butte. We followed him up these winding roads straight up the mountain. We passed cabins with snow cats in front of them. I later asked him how he got out to get food in the winter. He told me that used a snowmobile.

We got to his cabin - which was like something out of the Texas Chainsaw Massacre with its decor and atmosphere. What his cabin was - was a stoner's paradise. He broke out a bong and proceeded to fill the cabin with its aroma. Now, I am no stranger to pot. But I haven't smoked it since I was in college - and that was twenty years ago. I was really tempted, but I declined.

This seemed to set the mood for our whole trip.

Jersey grilled burgers for us on his porch that stood 16 feet off the ground, overlooking the moonlit Rockies. It was a magical night. We huddled around his laptop, watching conspiracy videos on YouTube, then we went off to bed. I slept in his loft, accessible only by ladder.

The next morning, we said goodbye to Jersey. he directed us down a dirt road that would take us quickly to the Interstate, swearing it would cut about 1.5 hours off our trip. It was one of the most beautiful drives I have been on. I will forever be haunted by the sunlight cresting those mountain tops. If I die today, I will forever praise God for letting me see such beauty. We saw deer, and we had to stop the car for several minutes while an enormous sheep herd passed us.

Soon, we were on pavement, and we headed north across Wyoming (which was more desolate than I imagined). By nightfall, we were in Cody, Wyoming. We could not find any motel with vacancy. We couldn't even find a campground with vacancy. So we pushed on to Billings, Montana.

We decided to go rebel again and picth our tent in a rest area. That went fine until the sprinklers went off at 6AM, drenching us. That was how our Montana adventure started. I will write bout Montana tomorrow...

Surgery & Census

So the event that had most impact on me this year was the DVT (blood clot in my left leg). They gave me some really sexy compression stockings that really made me feel like a woman and had me on meds.

When none of these worked and it became evident that the clot was travelling up my leg, they decided to try the "aggressive treatment", as they termed it. This involved an outpatient procedure of sticking a wire through my vein, breaking up the clot, and sucking it out. Then they would go through my groin (ouch!), install a filter in my vein that would prevent any clots from travelling to my heart or lungs.

I was really nervous about this procedure. Seven years previous, I had a procedure that had required me to be put out. When I came out of the procedure, I was trying to be funny with the nurses. Temple said that my version of "funny" was really vulgar. As a result, I have a deep phobia of - not surgery - but anesthesia.

The doctors assured me that I would be awake and able to function during the procedure.

"Will I be coherent?" I asked.

"Yes, but you won't care," they answered.

They rolled me into the room, administered the anesthesia, and it was kind of pleasant. I just kind of kicked back and made chit-chat with the surgeons. I even napped a while, snoring softly. When they wheeled me back into the recovery room, Martha was waiting for me. I made morew chit-chat with the nurse. I talked a little bit about Temple. Later, Martha told me, "I can't believe that you talked about Temple!"

I told her, "I never mentioned who Temple was, though."

Recovery was a slow process. My legs were still swollen and stiff. I had a enormous, purple bruise on my inner thigh where they had inserted the screen. But I started to get better.

Two weeks after my surgery, I got a phone call from Census Bureau, offering me a job. Since I had no other prospects (a hotel job in Tennesse had fallen through), I accepted. I had done three of the four major phases of the Census 2000, ao I kind of knew what to expect. Training proved that the job was basically the same as I remembered it.

Basically, I loved the job. Imagine cruising down dirt roads through Arizona's beautiful backcountry - Greer, Springerville, Eagar, Vernon, St. Johns and Concho. These are the areas I worked. It was totally enjoyable - except for a few things.

Being a Census Bureau employee during the Obama Administration was much different than ten years ago. People treated you like you were Obama himself knocking at your door. People did not want to cooperate, refused to answer questions, slammed doors in your face, told you how much they hated the government. One worker even received death threats.

And when these people refused to cooperate, the Bureau would send you out to them again.

At one point, a Census representative from D.C. came out to Arizona, and she was going to be riding with a worker. My supervisor put her with me.

"I want you to take her down the roughest roads possible," he said. "I want you to find the meanest people and possibly have a gun pulled on you. I want you to show her what it is we deal with out here."

.

So they put the Census Rep with me. She was a smart, pretty twentysomething right out of college. I bounced her around down 20 miles of dirt road to a homestead I had found. I was sure the people did not want to be found. It turned out the people were friendly.

.

The only problem with working Census not money. I got paid well. The mileage reimbursement was also good. But I beat the heck up outof my car. Those dirt roads were not kind on a sedan. My car went into the shop twice - once with a punctured transmission pan, and again with a damaged fuel pump. I think I'm still paying for car issues that originate with my stint with Census Bureau.

.

I worked for the Bureau until July. I quit when it was time to go on the fair circuit again, which is what I will write about tomorrow...

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Blog - Out of Hiatus

Hi, welcome back. I've decided to bring my blog out of hiatus.

The reason it was gone - I've had computer problems. My laptop finally bit the proverbial dust and went into that light from whence laptops return no more. I have always been very particular about how I blog. It must be on my own computer. It is like some OCD thing - like mystical writers who can only write with a certain pen, I can only blog with my own computer.

But I don't have a computer - which was really frustrating, because there is so much to write about right now, in my personal life, and in the world of polygamy. Over the next several days, I will try to play catch-up.

And I will not be using my own computer. I will use the public librarym other people's PCs... anything and everything used to do to get things done in the days before I had my own laptop. (I even wrote a novel on my lunch breaks, using my emploer's equipment.)

Good to be back, and talk atcha soon!