Dawn Porter's Extreme Wife Starts Today!

"Dawn Porter: Free Lover" airs today at 10PM in the UK! My segment will air on October 21.

Thanks to Dawn's letter, I am no longer aprehensive about it, but actually looking forward to it. As I said, I do not expect them to do a completly to a possitive approach, but an honest one.

To tell you the truth, I am less worried about how Dawn will portray me than some of the dumb sh** things I remember saying. Like the adultery thing.

Melissa, my friend in Alabama (who is not Mormon) told me, "I do not believe you. You are NOT adulterous by nature. If it was just you and Martha, I know you would not cheat."

You know, she is right. I don't think I could cheat, even if I wanted to. It isn't my nature. There are so many tabboos in my religious beliefs attached to cheating that I don't think I could.

Like I said, I said what I did to be a commentary for what I view as the polygamous nature of men, but in retrospect I think it was a dumb thing to say.

The most embarrassing moment - I remember that I dropped the F-Bomb once on camera. I think that my desire was to show that - as a religious fundamentalist - I do not perceive myself as prudish. I think that mainly it was just foolish and an insult to Mormon polygamists everywhere. I apologize for my weakness. I am not even sure if they will show it.

I did watch the clips on "Free Lover". It looks interesting and provacative - very different from the world that I am used to! Watch it if you can!

I did want to make a few observations about Joel (the cameraman's) interpretion of the shoot.

First of all, I really liked Joel. He was funny and neurotic - a fussy little man in a Woody Allen-esque sort of way.

But I find it odd how these people had such mixed experiences in dealing with my family. In my first blogs, you will see me gushing on how much I enjoyed the shoot and liked the crew. Then I find out that they felt differently.

1. Okay, I am Mexican. LOL. And proud of it. But I am also half English. Proud of that, too. The way Joel keeps going on and on about me being Mexican, I wonder if he has had some bad experiences with Mexicans in L.A. We are not all gang-banging vato locos, but generally we all like menudo and tortillas.

2. So which are we? I am Mexican; Martha is "kinda Asian". Or are we "white trash"? I had believed Hollywood people to be ultra-politically correct. Or is it the other way around?

3. Okay, I am a "fat Mexican". I get it. I am fat. I read it in Dawn's article. I read it several times in Joel's blog. Is there anyone who does not now know that I am fat?? I have gone on a diet and have lost 10 lbs. in the last month, so that is changing. I remember Joel making a big deal about a lunch that Martha made. She served us leafy salad and homemade stew and rolls. She shredded us some cheese to sprinkle on the stew, and Joel freaked about that, saying how unhealthy it was. To me, it was pretty healthy.

4. We were not homeschooling while they were there, because the "teachers" were being pulled aside every few minutes to do interviews. BTW, all kids are now in public school.

5. The stink - whenever the wind blows in from the east (as it was the days they were shooting) it kicks up an odor from under the trailer. We think it is the cats. It is not a smell that we live with constantly. (The wind seldom blows in from the east.) We were embarrassed already by it. Thanks for making the embarrassment keener. :)

6. Our toilets work.

7. The running water is disconnected, because we don't have enough gravity to get water from the well. There is a spicket next to the house that we use to fill water.

8. The trailer is in bad condition. It was only intended to be temporary. For years, my income went to support our commune (called a United Order). I am trying to better our living circumstances, but it will take time.

9. The chained-up dog was not vicious. It was a stray that we took in, so its lifestyle was considerabely better than it was before. The dog is spoiled on table scraps, so of course it would not eat a Cliff bar. I know few HUMANS that could stomach a Cliff bar, let alone a dog.

10. Joel does not know why my mother and I have differences, but it is NOT the reason he listed. I won't talk about it either.

11. We talked freely about our "Garments". Dawn asked us about them, and I did mention that some think they offer special protection, but I am not one of those. They are a sacred piece of clothing that represent my covenants with God - nothing more, nothing less. And they are certainly NOT magical.

12. My favorite memory of Joel: Watching Sandy (who is 6 foot 7 inch) tease Joel about being so short, and Joel answers, "I may be short, but I am appealing."

13. Congrats to you, Joel, on your new baby.

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One cool thing that happened to me yesterday - I got a letter from someone in Safety Net, the network working with the FLDS people in Arizona and Utah. Here is part of the letter:

Hi Moroni! Thanks for responding to me. The safety net is a collaboration btw active polygamists, advocates, social workers, law enforcement, and others. We are trying to repair some or the damage that has been done over the years. We are there to help people with social services but also to advocate for their rights etc... I have no opinion about plural marriage and understand the benefits associate with it. I do stand against abuse. Tell me more about you. Did you convert to the work? Any insights you have on what I am trying to do would be great. Any relatives down this way you think I should meet, etc? Good to hear from you!


Here is my response:

Hi, it's nice to hear from you. It sounds like you have a good network, and I hope that it is successful.

My training is in human services, and, although I work now in the construction industry, I spent 9 years as a case manager for Arizona's Department of Economic Security and was nominated by the governor for my work on devloping a diversity initiative for the agency. I have a different mindset when it comes to the polygamist world and social services.

For once, I do not believe that Arizona's CPS is as bad as Texas's agency, with the intent of ripping children away from the homes of polygamists. I understand organizations like CPS a little bit more than most and think that polygamist's fears of these agencies is exagerrated. I have always stated that the best way to resolve issues is to bring polygamist families to the table with law enforement and social service agencies. Removing the culture of secrecy is the best way to end malicious practices like placement and child marriages.

In addition, I networked with the polygamist community here in Apache County with the Family Assistance Administration and educated people that lying to get benefits would not protect families. Apache County is one of the few counties with polygamist communities that has little to no welfare fraud, due to my efforts.

I also do not believe in abuse.