The Blues Polygamist: Feedback about "Enquete Exclusive: Polygamie"

So it has been interesting reading the feedback from last week's "Enquete Exclusive".

Before I had a chance to see the show, I looked at some of the forums about the program. They were heated discussions about the Muslim problem in France. They scarcely even talked about the Mormon issue. In fact, any mention of Mormons was cursory. It got to the point where I thought that perhaps my family didn't have any significant part in the program.

Then I found all the tweets...

I just have to say - what do people do in this world? I live off grid, so I really don't know. Do people sit in front of the TV with laptops and talk about what they are watching? It sounds like many people need to get out of the house more.

The discussion forums - whereas they were argumentative - at least had some substance. The tweets were much baser. Not intelligent. Off the cuff remarks. And very mean-spirited. Which shows me that the French are not that much different from Americans. The comments were the same.

Every now and then, I get a perverse desire to punish myself by going to my YouTube clip. People still comment on it often all these years later. After tens of thousands of views and several hundred comments, I can still count on one hand the positive comments. There is the inevitable Christian who pontificates on how wrong polygamy is and that God hates it, even though the Bible is replete with God's prophets who were polygamous. But mostly it is the people who say how fat, ugly and creepy I am. And how did I ever get two women to marry me? Poor women! They must be brainwashed to marry such a fat, ugly person...

LOL! Well, guess what? I have to look in the mirror every day. I see how fat I am. I'm no Brad Pitt. And I have NO CLUE why my wives would want to be with me, much less stay with me. It mystifies me. And it frustrates me that - whatever message that I am trying to get across - is drowned by the fat. No one can hear what I am saying, because all they see is blubber.

It reminds me of that scene from "The Producers": "FAAAAT!!!!! FAAAAAT!!!! FAT, FAT, FATTY!" lol!

Anyway, the French comments were not much different. I won't even talk about the vulgar comments. But they seemed to clue in on everything. Many people commented on Martha's glasses, they made fun of the cooking - they even wondered if the cat that they showed was polygamous, too!

There were several comments about how I live with no electricity, and yet how is it that I have a Blackberry? Come on! I'm not Amish! There were people that criticized me for wanting to read before I go to bed. Okay, I get that one. I thought that was a stupid thing for me to talk about.

The funniest comment was, "How is it that this man has two wives when George Clooney doesn't even have one?"

Then several people started calling me "The Blues Polygamist". I didn't really understand that. Maybe it was the soul patch. But I like it. Maybe I should keep that moniker. "Moroni Jessop the Blues Polygamist."

A French scholar named Chrystal Vanel blogged a very interesting review of the show. He mentioned my family a bit. Keep in mind that it is translated from French:

"Besides the fundamentalist Mormon members of theU.S. fundamentalist church, the report mentions the "Mormons independent." No doubt the journalists, who already at the beginning of the story could not tell the full name of the U.S. Mormon church majority did they speak of "fundamentalist Mormons independents" who live their religion out of any group, any institution.

"Journalists we have therefore Moroni, who lives with his two wives and his children in Arizona, and we say it is the "first time an independent fundamentalist opens the door of his house." Well no, this is not the first time that Moroni opens its doors to television cameras, as evidenced by his blog:Moroni & Family's TV Experience ( http://moroni-family.blogspot.com/ ). In addition, the television channel France 2 we had already shown an independent fundamentalist Mormon family (with whom I spent a month in Utah / Arizona) during a report of Special Envoy in the late 1990s. And the M6 itself had presented an independent fundamentalist Mormon family in the exclusive investigative report on the Mormons (November 28, 2010).

"Moroni's second wife testified that polygamy is for her lifestyle choice freely without any constraint, since it is not from a polygamous family."

There was an excellent blog written by a French Mormon that I suggest you read here.

All in all, I am pleased with the results of the program. If I can reach one or two - and change their opinion about Mormon polygamy - then they can talk about how fat I am all they want! I hope you will all keep reading!

Enquête Exclusive : Polygamie – Au coeur de l’interdit - MY REVIEW!!

So the TV program that featured our family - "Enquete Exclusive" - aired on M6 in France last Sunday, on May 29th.

I didn't think that I would have a chance to watch it. I found it on M6's website, but there were permission issues. You can't watch it unless you are actually in France. But the other night, I actually found a couple of websites that actually aired the entire program. My heart started beating when I clinked on the link and saw the view from the top of our hill. Then I saw myself on TV, speaking (in English) to my kids with a French voice overdubbing me.

The show starts out with a man in Quebec, and his two wives. It showed them posing in bed, wearing cutesy pajamas. There wasn't much substance to their segment beyond, "Hey, look at us! We are polygamists, wearing matching pajamas, in the same bed! Woo hoo!"

Then they showed traveled back to France (with a small segment in Morocco) to discuss the polygamy problem among the Muslim population. It wasn't very positive, overshadowed with ominous music that sounded like something out of Dexter. They discussed Muslim men taking wives without telling the other wife, Muslim men abandoning other wives, Muslim men having wives in two different countries, Muslims taking advantage of welfare and public housing, etc. It was very negative. They showed many crying Muslim wives with their faces blurred out, telling of the difficulties of living polygamy. They had a couple of angry relatives, talking about how wrong polygamy is.

While I'm watching this, I understand that these women are suffering. I think that abuse is likely to be present in any culture where women become chattel, become property, where they have little to no say in their domestic lives. However, it was evident that the tone of this TV show was negative. I was wondering how they were going to tie in our family to this tragedy.

The show then moved over to Colorado City, Arizona. (So they DID visit another location!) They talked about the FLDS, about the raid of the YFZ Ranch in Texas, about Warren Jeffs and his imprisonment, about arranged marriages, etc. They showed Ted driving through the town, filming cars filled with local goon squad members following them through the streets (like they would do to any car with a camera in it.) Their visit included visiting a disaffected, former member by the name of Holmes who took them on a bus tour through the city. They stopped and talked to some random people and asked them if they loved their prophet, or some such question, to which they answered that they did. An old man in his garage was accosted, and he threatened to call the police.

I admit. I am not a huge fan of the FLDS. But this segment was a little sensationalized, and obviously it did not promote plural marriage in an encouraging light, either. I was starting to worry about whether this was going to be a hatchet job.

Then I saw some different scenery shots that I recognized as close to my house. Fortunately, the music changed, sounding less like "Twin Peaks" and more like "7th Heaven". Then the camera shows me walking between houses. My first thought was, "OMG, am I really that fat?" Ha ha. The second thought, they showed trailers and a big barn that I recognize, but that are NOT part of our religious community. They needed some good stock footage, I guess.

They introduced me as an independent Mormon fundamentalist (true) who doesn't recognize Warren Jeffs as his prophet (very true), and doesn't believe in arranged and/ or underage marriages (very, VERY true). They mention that I have studied in Europe, and then they have me introduce both of my wives, and their respective children (minus Sophie) - in very basic French.

The narrator says that we live the way we do as fugitives, as pariahs, and that is why we live the way we do without electricity. I guess maybe we do, but I never really considered myself a fugitive.

It is mentioned that this is the first time that an independent Mormon fundamentalist has opened his doors to the media. LOL! Well, that is not exactly true. I am certainly not the first polygamist who has had cameras in his home. This is not even the first time that I have had the media in my home. BUT... It is the first time that I have had the French media in my home, so that is what they must have meant!

They talk a little bit about how hard it is to find jobs in such a desert region, but that Temple - an "assistante maternelle" - provides the salary that sustains the family. Temple is interviewed and talks about how no one forced her into this relationship, that she consented to it. She comes from a family that does not practice polygamy, and that she is happy.

Martha talked a little bit about the theology of plural marriage, but it was kind of hard to focus on anything but her glasses. At that time, her glasses had broken, and we hadn't had the chance to do anything about it yet. Her glasses were dangling from her face. Poor Martha...

Oh, and they did feature Christian chopping wood - just as I hoped he would!

I have to say, I was really proud of my kids. They did an interview with them as they walked between houses. They were exuberant and happy, all of them trying to answer Ted's questions about growing up in such a large family at once. They were truly the centerpiece of this segment. They even showed me having a staged class with the kids about plural marriage. They all answered beautifully. Sara talked about a wife having more than one husband as cheating. I laughed at that. Aidan gave a beautiful answer about the purpose of plural marriage. I can't say enough how proud I was.

After the "class", they show the kids running out to play on the swings. The next part made me laugh so hard. My six year-old son Alex can't read yet. He just graduated from kindergarten. He found a copy of a tiny New Testament. He carried this book around with him everywhere. They filmed him on the playset, reading from this book while on the swing. And the narrator says something like, "And even while they play, Moroni's kids find time to study from the Book of Mormon."

Alex probably was doing it this as an affectation, trying to show the cameras that he can read, when in fact he cannot. But it was so funny that this is the way that they interpreted it. I loved it.

While I am pushing my kids on the swing, I talk - very tongue-in-cheek - about Mormons taking over the world, not by the sword, but by procreation, thus making the whole world Mormon. Even though I was joking, I am sure that some took this very seriously.

The next scene shows Martha and Temple making dinner while I sit at the table, looking at my Blackberry. They something about me supervising. Not true. I know nothing about cooking, so how could I supervise? But I am wearing this impatient look on my face. Probably because I am hungry! After Aidan offers a prayer, we have dinner, and they conduct interviews with the three of us.

After dinner, they film me walking between houses, talking about the challenges of living plural marriage. I don't like this part, mainly because I think I sound stupid while I talk.

The next day they interviewed us while we were standing by our car. I talk a little bit about the differences in each relationship. Martha talks about the need to sacrifice in order to make it work. Then the program ends.

I'm not sure how my segment was congruous when juxtaposed with the Muslim problem. I don't see how they are similar, except that we have polygamy in common. I don't even see how we can be compared to the FLDS. But I must say that - in spite of it being a negative show about polygamy - our segment was very positive. I am very pleased how it turned out. Ted Anspach and M6 treated us with dignity and respect, and I want to thank them for their honest portrayal of our family..

What I Did For Love...

After the French film crew left, they said that they were driving to Utah to film some stock footage of the Mormon temple, etc., and then flying home. It crossed my mind that they were going to film other polygamist families, like Dawn Porter had gone to Centennial Park after our house. Again, with the reticence. I wouldn't have cared if they were filming someone else. In fact, I would have made suggestions for them.

Even though Ted Anspach asked all the questions, he would not be featured at all in the upcoming documentary about my family. The segment would be called "Enquete Exclusive", and the TV personality who would be speaking about us is a man named Bernard de La Villardiere. You can check out the website here. As far as I know, they have not yet aired our segment. Ted said that it would be sometime in May. But I have tried to contact Ted and have received no reponse.

In the days that followed, I thought about the whole experience. It was much more pleasant, and we were treated with dignity. However, I am not naive to think that every experience will be like this. The media is fickle. Even though these French journalists were so NICE, there is someone I grew up with who lived several year in France and Belgium. He told me that I would be stupid to trust any French journalist.

As evidenced in my previous blogs, I couldn't help but compare it to the experience with Dawn Porter, doing the shows for British TV, TLC and History Channel. When I really think about it, the questions that both film crews asked were kind of the same.

But more importantly, my answers were kind of the same. The more I thought about it, it was kind of redundant. My response are always the same, on TV, and on the several online forums that I belong to.

It's like this - my dad used to say that he never liked taking college courses by the same professor. It only took one semester to clue in on all of the professors beliefs, platforms and stances. If you took another class with the same professor, you got just more of the same.

And that's what this felt like. More of the same. With the trouble involved in putting yourself and your family out there, on camera, it just didn't seem worth it anymore. I've said all that I can say in this forum. It's time to find another way to express myself.

Several days after the shoot, Martha took the kids to Sunday School. I wasn't feeling that well, so I was asleep on the couch. Martha was also going to pick up my daughter Sophie from her grandmother's house to spend the day with the family. I got a phone call from Martha. Sophie didn't want to come home, too much homework, or something like that.

"You're the parent," I said. "Make her come home."

A little while later, my nap was interrupted when Martha and Sophie came in, arguing loudly. I was irritated at being woken up in such a manner. But Sophie demanded to speak to us immediately.

The issue was not about having to come home. The issue was that we went in front of the cameras again.

"You're doing it just to get another wife," my daughter accused me.

That couldn't be more untrue. With my health and financial issues, I can't imagine any woman who would want to come into my family. Doing the interviews was NOT about adding to my family.

"Do you remember when your aunt Sarine sent the media after us, and they made up lies and tried to get me and the family involved in all their filth?" I told her. "I lay awake many nights after that, after the raid in Texas, just worried about that something was going to happen, that someone was going to take away the kids. There were people out there that were saying things about me, saying things that weren't true.

"I realized that if I did not speak up for myself, other people would speak for me. I needed to show them that I would not shut up, that I would not just sit by and take it. THAT is the ONLY reason that I went in front of the cameras. I'm not going to just sit idly by. Now people know that I am not afraid to say something about it. There is not any bullshit that they can pull without me speaking up, without me blogging about it."

"You don't understand, dad," Sophie said. "You're going to get the kids taken away. There are people out there who want to take away the kids. There are people out there who are just looking for any excuse to do it."

The thought that crossed my mind was that people - adults - had been speaking to my daughter at school. There are always do-gooders out there who might try to "rescue" her. I asked her to clarify, but she stayed away from giving a clear answer.

"And I will fight them," I said. "I will never stop fighting. I can't."

The truth is - I love Sophie. I love her more than she will ever know, and I would never force her into this lifestyle. There is nothing that I want more for her than to be happy. I love all of my children that way.

And it pisses me off - because Sophie is right. There are people out there who would take them away from me forever. How messed up is that? We are a happy family. We are well-adjusted. Why would anyone care enough to even bother with us?

But that is my reason - as much as even Mormon fundamentalists criticize us. I will fight for my rights. And I will go in front of the cameras again and again if it keeps us safe.

Thanks for all the kind words about my blog. There is much more to say, so I hope you will tune in.